Part Eight
BULLYING IN OCEANIA

The Oceanic group was an aggressive lot, with the three frightening Hawai’ian gods as leaders. Barbara decided to let Father Damien, who had given much of his life caring for the lepers in Hawai’i, deal with them, and picked him up from the Saints section and carried him to the Oceanic group. He’d been chatting about lower-calf pain with St. Peregrine and frowned; however, he knew where duty lay. He looked at the three gods atop the pillar and shook his head sadly. “Shame on you, Amakua, Makini, and Lono. You should behave in a more godlike manner.”
“Father D,” Makini reminded him, “We’re warrior gods. We’re supposed to bully. Remember our hymn?
Kill off the weak, Without any fuss, If it’s goodness you seek, Don’t come to us.”
“You forbade us to sing it,” said ‘Amakua, his one eye shining with glee. The rest joined in the chorus of several fierce war-whoops.
Father Damien raised his eyes to the heavens for inspiration, saw the storeroom ceiling, and lowered them. “I was grateful,” he continued, “when I learned that I had contacted leprosy so I could say ‘we lepers’ instead of ‘you lepers.’ Gratitude. Look at you in Oceania, all that space and a landing strip! You should be down on your knees thanking Barb—I mean god.”
Makini, without taking his intimidating eyes off the little Dirawong who was trying to climb the pillar unnoticed, asked if Father Damien wanted to make a bet on which one of the three could make it to the top without being bitten by the spider. The Dirawong heard, shivered, and slipped down, the Sea Turtle froze, but the Madup managed to scamper to the top without being bitten. Those who had won the bet repeated the war-whoop. Father Damien bent over with difficulty, cursing his leprosy, picked up the three little Entities, and placed them on the landing strip, saying that John Frum would keep an eye on them.
“He never arrived. That soldier stuff is only toys. The Vanuatuans thought they were creating a god who would bring them great wealth, but—”
“Most of you were brought into being in exactly the same way,” said Father Damien pointedly. There was a sudden and hostile silence, and Barbara thought she’d better leave. As she turned away, she was relieved to hear Makini seemed to have forgiven Father Damien. Both were betting on who would next alight on the landing strip, with Father Damien favoring the Archangel Michael (“Seen the wing span on that dude?”) and Makini Isis. Barbara walked over to the Asian section hoping for a bit of peace and quiet with the Buddhists.